OT: Short Story. Laetoli

Billy d wrote on 7/7/2007, 10:41 PM
If any of you are interested I'd be pleased to hear your comments on this short story of mine:
http://exposure.cbc.ca/video/laetoli

Done in Vegas, sound recorded on an MAudio Microtrack in my studio (Ahem.. my spare bedroom :) and edited in Soundforge.

Not a very good rating on their web site by the viewers though and I guess rightly so.
Comments so far are not enough video.
Right of course, but I don't live in Kenya anymore so getting more pics is not an option. Besides I'm a sound man :)
Oh and I do voice over, currently just starting up at this and looking for exposure and willing to work for free.

Comments

bw wrote on 7/8/2007, 1:46 AM
I liked it. It must have taken a lot of courage to do those slow fades, very effective though. Your voice should do well.
Cheers, Brian
farss wrote on 7/8/2007, 3:45 AM
Story is great, voice is great. Music in the later part doesn't seem to quite fit.
The key element of the story is the footsteps in the rock that have survived almost since time began, seeing them is the dramatic climax and they're not there, bummer! Find them, make them, whatever, it deserves them. Try museums, there must surely be a photo of them or something similar in the public domain.

Bob.
Paul Fierlinger wrote on 7/8/2007, 6:43 AM
I think the phrases have been overused by decades now and would suggest turning the film into a transparent hoax. I'd step out into my little garden and do all the shooting there, including my own footsteps; if it's the voice over you want to sell...
fishbelt wrote on 7/8/2007, 9:22 AM
The long period of darkness.. seems some shadow like pictures would help. Or some night sounds. I like a good story and it was. I really enjoyed it. fishbelt
Billy d wrote on 7/10/2007, 5:22 PM
Just uploaded version 2, complete with extra photos from my buddy Gran in London, of Olduvai Gorge and the caves at Suswa.
MUCH better (I think). :-)
Thankyou all for your comments.

Here's the new url:
http://exposure.cbc.ca/video/laetoli-1

Had a real hard time getting the CBC web site to show it widescreen.
I have to render to avi in Vegas 7.0e uncompressed using 0.9091 PAR. (The original is a normal widescreen Vegas project designed for dvd).

Then I convert to Flash8 .flv format using Flix8. But if you watch the vid you'll see that I lose widescreen on the ending shot. No idea why.
How should I get Flix8 (Standard) to give me widescreen from my Vegas project - Anyone any ideas?